An accurate representation of tumblr right now
Ellie felt her cheeks heating up. What was happening now?
“Um…” She stuttered, trying to play it cool. Riley was right next to her, looking through the sketchbook they shared. Doodles filled half the page, lousy scribbles of the pair with profanity decorating speech bubbles. It was a silly, fun way to pass the time.
“Hm?” Riley said, as though her playing with Ellie’s hair was a natural thing. Something they did all the time. It wasn’t, for the record.
“Nothing.” Ellie said, but it came out as a whisper, one that didn’t reach Riley’s ears. Her fingers were at the back of Ellie’s head, spinning a lock of hair around her finger slowly. A shiver went down Ellie’s spine.
“Say again? You got to speak up if you want me to hear you,” Riley said in amusement, “Geez, it’s a good thing I like you so much.”
Again, Ellie’s nerves shot on fire. She bit her lip, leaning closer to Riley, pressing her pencil back onto the page.
“Are you flirting with me?” Ellie asked before thinking it through. Her hand didn’t stop, but Riley tensed for a moment.
“…Do you mind?”
Ellie had been waiting for Riley to tease her for the obvious redness of her face. She looked over and met her eyes, seeing Riley looking at her curiously. She was still playing with her hair, fingers threading through and massaging her scalp. Ellie hummed in approval and smiled.
“No. Not really.”
- "Wait right there, don’t move!"
- "That’s a good look for you."
- "Could you repeat that?"
- "Hey, have you seen the…? Oh.”
- "Everything’s going to be fine."
- "This isn’t exactly what I had in mind."
- "Are you flirting with me?"
- "Must be a day ending in y."
do you ever think about how little Michelangelo cared
All right, everyone, grab a chair and sit back because I’m going to share with you what I learned about Michelangelo and the Sistine Chapel in my Art History Class.
The man NEVER wanted to paint the damn thing. But the pope at the time “forced him to” According to my teacher. Michelangelo hated this man, I MEAN REALLY HATED HIM. So did a majority of people. The pope’s nickname translated literally means “Terrible pope”.
And the working conditions were awful. He had to work on his back with all that paint, which is filled with some toxic shit that gave Michelangelo a limp for the rest of his life.
(Also, our teacher made us get on our backs and try drawing with both hands JUST to prove how bad and uncomfortable it is.)
At the time, the ceiling was so high, you could barely see it. You need binoculars to get a good look at what’s up there, by the time people could see the paintings, there was a lot of weird symbolism that Michelangelo hid up there.
This one? The creation of the sun and moon? God is mooning you. And the pope and all others after him prayed under that without knowing.
This one? At the time, dissecting was sacrilegious and everyone found out how behind God was what looked like half a brain. blah blah, science, science, that pissed everyone off.
And also, ALLLLLLL the men and women in the Sistine Chapel are all on fucking steroids. My teacher described the women’s bodies as "Men bodies with boobs slapped on."
And then there is this:
Now this is the back wall. Michelangelo actually wanted to paint this one after he finished the ceiling. (and there was a different pope too, I believe.) However, originally, EVERYONE in that painting was naked. And they didn’t like it. Adam and Eve naked? That’s cool. But Jesus? Now you crossed the line. So the pope at the time hired someone else to censor it and give the important figures clothes. He worked on it for 6 or 9 months before he died.
And then the symbolism in this one is great. Somewhere in the right, there are homosexuals in heaven. (No matter what, the Vatican will say “Those straight men are happy” I’ll get to that in a second), Michelangelo painted himself near Jesus, and the terrible pope is in hell with a snake biting his balls.
And if you were to point ANY of this out to the Vatican, they will deny all of it and claim Michelangelo was a catholic hero. In fact, when they discovered the symbolism around the 60s or 70s, the guy who told the Vatican was kicked out of the Vatican for life.
TL;DR: Michelangelo hated the pope and made the best “fuck you” of all time.